ppl grows..

My world is changing...
The universe is turning...
There are no more lolipops or merry-go-rounds..
no more cute stuff& cheerful [toopid]laughter..
It passes so fast i dont even know where am i heading...

is it the uni certificate what i want?
is it hg?
is it money?
is it employment?
is it to feel needed?
is it to boast about something?
is it position?
is it popularity?

WHAT IS IT?!
i dont even know..
but im gonna figure out what..
i cant let myself fell to uncertainty..
i cant be a kid to decide..
i cant flashback the whole friggin time& ignore my future..
lun is like... oh-so-yesterday...
high school is over...
kiddy-game is not to be touched..
adult games?
call me chicken or what-so-ever...
i don't give a da*n..
well,,, that's why i dont wanna grow up..
i guess that's the bitter reality of life..

what is all about a human?
a baby turning to whining school girl,
teenager... university.. working.. having hubby... having kids... the kids grow up, you grow old.. and die..
omg i just sounded so morbid... well excuse me..

haizzz.. you know what,
dreams comin true ain't nice the whole time..
my childhood dream was to throw an awesome sweet17 party..
but now? the passion is no more there...
it just...
passes....
like that...
5 hours& that's IT..
leaving me with agony... is that what i am dreaming of?
well, the party was cool...
but it just.... ended so fast...
5 hours... the 5 hours i had been waiting for, for the past 14 years of my life!
it ended in 5 hours?!!!

moving on... *randomness*

hmm... i used to be in science accel class.. not even pre-u yet...
i str8 away jumped to uni.. with O level cert..
business stream... call me nuts.... but that's the truth..
the types of competition is changing..
im beckoned to be volatile liquid..
a chameleon...
if sulking is what i want, im not doing it..
do i hate it? not really...
i wanna be better....
i wanna be a social mammal..
i wanna be strong...
i wanna forget those pains..
i wanna turn over a new leaf..

k, its getting late.... i need to do a lot of stuffs... & oh ya... i wanna stop contradicting myself... im not 'that' moody by the time..... but if my post made you 'swt'... just ignore it... pls dont be a bitch about it... [im not being sarcastic]

welll then...
till the next post!
*_仙_*